mairead
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Docxtor BlackadderHey BA, whatever happened to yuor cousin the 'Doctor' Did you poison him?
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Babygael
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mairead, I think I saw him heading over the hills and hurdling the hedge rows in fine style muttering something aboot nurse ratchet and killin????  
Onyhoo, tae my surprise there wis Black Adder and his yokel baldrick,in hot pursuit while throwing fervent glances over their shoulders. At first I didnae ken wot wis gaun oan but anyhoo there wis his lordship trying to keep up, unsuccessfully I might add, he wis a wee bit behind, weel lets face it, we all know he runs like a girl, wait ! No!! what am I saying? Worse than a girl then and making more noise than a plucked goose doon oan a cauld windy Farm.
weel onyroad,as I glanced further behind the thrashing,squealing peer o' th' realm ye cud o' huv knocked me doon wi' a feather!! , Rounding th' corner doon by th' loch, nurse ratchet appeared in a swirl of tartan, uttering blood curdling laffs, her flaming hair swirled aboot her like a nest o' vipers. Och says she, pulling up short tae brush her locks oot o' her een, " Ave goat tae git an appointment fur a perm soon so I huv!!
Meanwhile on having her vision cleared she espied his Lordship faltering in th' mud and with renewed vigour she raised her purse aboot her heid and in thrice she wis upon the poor thrashing BlackAdder and as ahm a lady ah weel noat say onymair   Suffice tae say, m'lud wis somewhat th' worse for wear.......... aifter. 
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mairead
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Aye, auld Rachet wis a bugger wae thon hatchet right enough. Mind you, there wiz only yin target she hud in mind, an it wiznae his heid either, but he surely sang in a higher note oan that day.
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Blackadder
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BG ... your imagination was sorely taxed with this fever-dream! I suggest you take two Prozac and go for a midnight swim off Ragged Point! I take it you know where that is?
Doctor (without the x) Blackadder is back home in Canada. I'll let him know you were asking for him, shall I?
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Babygael
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taxed? Not at all my dear BA, in fact I'm just warming up!! 
Mairead hen so he does have them then??
Is Dr. BA a Mountie too? Poseur!! 
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mairead
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Erm BG. Well no any longer. Hee Hee
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Blackadder
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The doctor is not a mountie. A mountebank? That's possible! Next time I see him I'll ask him.
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mairead
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Well whatever he is, he is now minus part of his anatomy. Hee Hee Hee. Didn't run fast enough you see.
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Blackadder
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What the heck does THAT mean?? Seriously ... I think you've gone round the bend.
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mairead
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Oh, I'm sure you know fine, Mr Innocent. Better watch out or you might be next for a 'bobbit' job.
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Blackadder
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Aye right! You's have to catch me ... ant's never going to happen. I'm ten steps ahead of you lot!
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mairead
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Aye, dream on my dear. Your delusions are beginning to surface again.
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Blackadder
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I do not have delusions ... any more! My brain has been fixed since the crash. Can you say that?
(I know I'm walking into it on this one ... but what the heck ... you're only young once!)
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mairead
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LOL. Mine was fixed long ago.
Thankfully I did not have to undergo the horror you did, and no, I won't take advantage of your terrible accident but I am truly glad you are well now and can even joke about it. I doubt if I could. XXX
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Blackadder
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I think your "fix" may have "unfixed" itself if it was so long ago. You might need another "fix". Do you have a "fixer"?
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mairead
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Wish I had then I could share it with YOU.
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Blackadder
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I think you have an unhealthy "fixation" with me. One I do not share!
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mairead
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Wheeee. Get a grip on yourself BA. Your delusions are getting much worse.
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Blackadder
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I see you write to confirm my hypothesis! Or as the Aussies would say, you got tickets on yourself!
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mairead
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Confirm? The only thing I can confirm is that you appear to have lost the plot.
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Blackadder
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You''ll have to remind me. What plot was that then?
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mairead
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Take your pick from your many dastardly schemes.
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Blackadder
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Er ....... number 994/B/78HY/001 P ... Does that strike any bells?
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mairead
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Yep, that's the very one. My you are quick today, are you not.
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Blackadder
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Not really ... I sent one of my nephews a birthday card. Phoned him up today to say Happy Birthday and ask if he got the card. He said yes ... he knew it was from me (my choices of cards are always consistent) ... but why didn't I write anything on the card? I didn't write in it??? I think I'm going mad! 
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mairead
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Och, I wouldn't worry about it. We all get a bit forgetful now and then. Stress, pressure at work etc.
I once went to the microwave oven to put my washing on. LOL
Another time I took a packet of ground coffee and instead of emptying it into the coffee container on the worktop, I began to pour it into the cup I had just taken out.
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Blackadder
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I've gone into another room and suddenly wondered what I was there for ... but that's about the extent of it. Not as bad as you .......... yet!!!
Wait till you go to the computer to write a letter ... and start looking for your pen!!!
That's when you should worry, I think.
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mairead
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I haven't done that one ... YET...
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Blackadder
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Me neither ... but it'll come ... hopefully to you first because you're Mrs Methuselah.
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mairead
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and I just don't look it at all. Can you say the same.????????
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Blackadder
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I'm only 42. You're like 72, aren't you?
I have a "Dorian Gray" type painting in my attic! 
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