carol
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what kids sayI'm not exactly known for my culinary skills 
Had intended to have a BBQ for my sons and some friends, obviously the weather put a stop to that. So I ended up cooking in the kitchen (doing my usual juggling), basic stuff like sausages, beefburgers, chicken etc. After clearing up my 4 yr old says to me 'that was a fun dinner party mum' 
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Blackadder
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Is your cooking seen more as an burnt offering or a scrifice to the Gods, Carol?
My sainted late mother claimed hers was Cordon Bleu ...... but our cook said was more like cordoned off! 
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carol
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for once not even a sausage burnt 
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kathyv
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I wonder what odd little tid-bits young BA uttered?
One of my students came to class one morning telling me his mom was 'all milked out'. I thought what he could have really meant, I know his mom well, this student was her youngest, and is 9, I didn't figure she was wet nursing anything and calmly, without a trace of shock on my face, asked him to explain. he said his mom had got up at 5, and got the cow all milked before the family was up so they had fresh milk for breakfast. I gather that she usually doesn't milk until everyone has left for school.
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Blackadder
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Blackadder ... he say ...
1 ) Sin: I didn't invent it. I'm only trying to perfect it!
2 ) Save Scotland. When you die take an Englishman with you.
3 ) Philogyny recapitulates erogeny; erogeny recapitulates philogyny.
4 ) Dogs have masters. Cats have staff.
5) It's my cat's world. I'm just here to open the tins.
6 ) Follow your dream! Unless it's the one where you're Macnumpty at work in your underwear during a fire drill.
7 ) Wouldn't it be nice if, whenever we messed up our life, we could simply press "Ctrl Alt Delete" and start all over?
8 ) Time is just nature's way to keep everything from happening at once.
9 ) They call it PMT because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
10) I demand less corruption ... or at least more of an opportunity to participate in it.
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carol
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I see BA is a cat lover??
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Alasdair
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I presume we're talking in the evil bond baddie kind of cat lover vein then!
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Babygael
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If I take that to mean what I think you ment it to mean KV,and since carol, intimated it, then the answer would be a resounding YES!!
BA should go to the top of the class teacher! An' we could gi' him the Gold finger while we're at it? Huh? can we huh? 
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Blackadder
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I have several cats, all of which I love very much. Their wellbeing comes before that of the peasants.
When it comes to class ...... I am simply head, shoulders, hips and feet above all of you!!!
And as for the finger, BG ... this is for you ...  ....... 
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carol
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unfortunately I'm allergic to cats 
when it comes to class BA like your cats you're beneath us 
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Blackadder
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Here, Carol ... ... this is for you too! 
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carol
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nasty nasty nasty
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Blackadder
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!!!
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carol
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BA I'm dropping my niceness ................ you do my fcukin tits in
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macnumpty
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BA, my dream is not for me to be in my underwear, but for an attractive co-worker to be in his underwear in the office during a fire drill.
Then the sprinklers go off.
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kathyv
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BA likes cats, hmmmm, that answers a lot of questions and gives him something familliar. . .  
My grandson once responded to his Mom's complement to him during the long 3 day drive to Grandma's house, "You're such a good traveling boy" with "Yes, I am!" He's so cute!
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Blackadder
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| Quote: | | responded to his Mom's complement to him |
I love how you have a go at MY English then come out with this.
Where did you go wrong ... Let's see ......
1) Mum ... not Mom!
2) Compliment ... not complement which has a different meaning!
3) Granny ... not Grandma!
4) Travelling ... not traveling!
On a Scottish site, you should try to use proper English and not your Mirrikin, which is an abased form of English.
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kathyv
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This is amazing, BA you are the ONLY Scot I've ever encountered anywhere that has actually encouraged an American to use your idiomatic language forms!
Are you feeling OK?
There are several reasons why I didn't:
Mum is a flower here in the States and while I believe my daughter is lovely, she's no flower so I'll refer to her as Mom.
Granny rides around on a rocking chair in the back of her son's old truck, she has a corn cob pipe in her mouth, a jug of White Lightening at her feet and she shoots at things. That's not me! (Be glad I don't shoot at things. . . )
I'll graciously accept that Traveling and Compliment got past me, you're a dear/your a deer for helping with my spelling! Thank you so much. I don't bow to your abilities!
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Blackadder
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Can you lighten white any lighter?? Or did you mean "White Lightning"?
Are you sure you're a teacher? Maybe just a netball coach with aspirations unsupported by enough of an intellect??
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Babygael
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The sum total of BA's English repertoire and I quote........... (And you talk about me!) Wot cheek!!  At least when I do it, is more friendly in nature I.E........  
I think KV got it right, BA, its the High Blood pressure, well either that or its the monthly PMT's Och I'm just pulling yer leg, I love yer really
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Blackadder
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You all take things SO seriously ..........
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kathyv
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BA, you've obviously never met Granny. She's a tough old bird but can't spell, she's the one who wrote it White Lightening, I was quoting!
Are you sure you are royalty? I would have thought royalty would have someone to flash their finger gestures for them! Take your meds sonny, we don't want anything bad to happen to you. Who would care for the cats then and terrorize the peasantry?
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Blackadder
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My secretary does the typing on this thing! You don't honestly think I'D soil my hands on it, do you???
And no, I'm not Royalty. I am a belted Earl ... which will make Carol pleased since she won't understand what that means, and will think someone just took a swing at me. You explain ... I can't be arsed!
My hereditary servant, Baldrick looks after the cats ........ and terrorises ME! Or he would if I let him in the mansion when I'm asleep. He sleeps with the pigs. I know ... it's a terrible smell ... but the pigs are used to him now!
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kathyv
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You know, there is another, more American meaning for belted, which, being American, I jumped right to that meaning!
Being a belted earl could be fun, for a while but the headache in the morning might be nasty!
'Course, that kind of belted could lead to one of those redneck tattoos!
(I Love -Baldrick- none of that boring -insert name here- stuff for you! heh heh heh) 
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Blackadder
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Baldrick is a complete idiot, from a long line of idiots. How can you like someone you've never met/will never meet??
Or are you too, being influenced by the BBC comedy show based on my ancestors' memoirs, from which Mr Lloyd and Mr Elton drew their inspiration??
In which case, Baldrick is not alone in his idiocy!
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Babygael
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Weel excuuuuuuse me yer Lordship! And here wus I thinking that yew were SCOTTISH! Yer lineage seems to sugest otherwise.......a sasannach no less!
Kv on the other hand (in Gaelic) is Ban-Ameireaganach, from Na Staitean Aonaichte, the united states of America. If you are female you would put Ban in front of the nationality.
Remember of course, that when Gaidlig was the everyday language in much of Scotland, no one ever heard of the USA, so these words are new additions to the language, as is computer and so many more!
So you know, I am doing anything to delay the inevitable class work!!
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kathyv
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Glad we can help with the delays! How's it all going anyway? Is -nach a Gaelic suffex? Or is the spelling in both sasannach and Ban-Ameireaganach coincidence?
Lord BA, I was merely suggesting a tattoo choice for your good self, not me, I have a terrible aversion to needles! I was thinking in the spirit of good class relations you could take that first, tiny little step and get the tattoo yourself, I'm sure you can afford it, then your beloved subjects would love you even more because of your great show of affection.
And just think how wonderful Baldrick would feel knowing he has your special affection!
And that particular BBC show comes on much too late for me, I can't stay awake for it! It's a shame someone leaked your family history to those men, I wonder who would have had the brass to do that?
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Blackadder
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Leaked?? Where'd you get THAT idea???
I made a small fortune from supplying them with the core material! They're the ones who made out my family was English (the Blackadders are Scots nobility) and, it has to be said, very funny and hugely corrupt.
As for tattoos ..... I share you aversion to needles. If I had to self inject, put me in the middle of an airfield and my back would still have to find a wall before a needle penetrated my beautiful and soft aristocratic skin!!!
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Babygael
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Well KV I am not that great with Gaelic grammar but Nach is a word in it self..........
nach till e....will he not return?
Am fear nach till......he who shall not return
An la` air nach till e.......the day on which he returns not
Nach e`? Isn't it?
So I guess it is a suffex? For example words ending in idh, is the future ending as in cuiridh mi......I shall put
I didn't find getting a small tatoo in any way painfull, you guy's are WUSSES!!!
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Blackadder
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I got my (small) tattoos done when I was much younger, also my piercings. I spent nearly two weeks in the school infirmary with blood-poisoning after them!  I am, therefore, in a position where I can thoroughly recommend you get PROFESSIONALS to do yours ... and not your schoolmates! 
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kathyv
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kathyv, admitted wuss!
BA, you must be my long lost brother! How do you feel about bananas? heeheehee!!!!!
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Blackadder
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Fyffes ... or the ones grown under the European Directive determining the angle of the banana curve??
And I am not now or ever have been your long-lost brother. I am an aristocrat ... you are a lowly peon!!
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kathyv
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Any banana! They are all nasty! LOL
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Blackadder
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A banana-hater, eh? Tell us, have you ever thought of peeling away the yellow skin before trying to eat one?? Even monkeys worked that one out!
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kathyv
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Of course! But even then, nasty!
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Blackadder
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Might've known ... you're a colobus!!!
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kathyv
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No, I have full thumbs!
   
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Blackadder
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Those aren't yours! They're the programmed icons! Colobus monkeys have no thumbs ... lovely fur ... but no thumbs!!
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kathyv
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I planned to show you a pic of the real thing but I can't seem to get a pic to load. . . and I'm pretty tired right now, there is a book upstairs calling my name so I think I'll just let you believe what you like about the opposable digits! Remember, if you ARE my long lost brother, you might want to accept when I tell you that my family all have their thumbs, and they are where they are supposed to be.
Ears on the other hand(!LOL) are questionable! How do your ears look?
I do have lovely hair though! 
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Blackadder
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I have about average ears like most people. One has a slightly elfin tip to it, but al of my family have carried this genetic trait. It'd nothing to be ashamed of ... and every woman has complimented me on it. I have very sensous ears. Which go well with my excellent hearing.
I agree most women are very lucky with their luxurious tresses. Fortunately I do not have male pattern baldness and have fine hair which reaches my collar. Short hair is for puritans!
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kathyv
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Sensuous ears huh? Maybe you are a Feringie! heh heh heh
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Blackadder
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You are thinking of the Ferengi ......... and no! I don't derive all that much oomox from them.
You should go to Ferenginar and learn a woman's place from them.
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kathyv
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That might work, if I had sensuous ears!
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Blackadder
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You really don't know about the Ferengi culture, do you? Sensuous big ears, oomox, the Rules of Acquisition and a predilection for collecting gold-pressed latinum isn't everything you know. The role of females in Ferengi society has its admirers in certain sections of today's Earth. I suggest you google Ferengi. I prefer to be a person, with an encyclopaedic knowledge of all things Trek!
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kathyv
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Actually BA, I do understand your sick plot to keep women naked! It won't work!
You aren't one of those who dress up and go to Trek conventions are you? PLEASE say no!
My grandson called to say Nikki, the dog, had puppies, he's so excited, Mom (Mum!) said he could hold one. Then the puppy told him it loved him!
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Blackadder
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No .... I'm not THAT much of a Trekkie!
My newest nephew ... one week old today ... told me he loved me. I felt his love soak my arm as I held him!!!
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kathyv
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Now you are a member of the peed-on club!
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Blackadder
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With babies ... I'm a member of that club of long standing!
That's okay though. When the little sod's about two, I fully intend to pee on him from a very great height!
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